My name is Amanda.

Sometimes I feel like I could be so many things, and at the same time I am none of it. I think one of the greatest mysteries and searches of life is to find something that you are exceptionally good at so naturally it's almost as easy as breathing.  I have yet to find that.  My aspirations (I don't even know if I use that word correctly) change almost weekly.  One day I want to write, next month I want to be a broadway singer, television actress, art restorer.

Some things are funny. We have an ENTIRE world to explore. It's huge (mostly because we are so small) and all I want is an apartment one state over.

I'm sixteen, I have time--I hope. I can't drive yet. A part of me is enthused at the idea of driving off to the mall or Noho when I want to. At the same time I am absolutely terrified of getting behind the wheel. Merging onto a highway scares me the most.

This post so far makes me sound like a pessimistic teenager who's hating the world. Quite the opposite. I'm extremely optimistic about most things.  I don't feel that I'm living my teenage life though. I don't go to parties--mainly because I am not invited. It's not that I don't have friends it's just I have two crowds of friends (well more than that) one of whom is probably full of some hardcore partiers and another that is connected to some partiers but they wouldn't ever get drunk themselves. They're like morally against it--whatev.

But that is an intro into my somewhat life. I hope to get friends on mindsay. I have a journal at livejournal. From that site I kept one friend. I had three good ones. THe first one lied to us so often that you just don't come back from that. And the other was a two faced evil bitch--nuff said. The third is sweet and I adore her.

that's all for now

--Amanda